Mishneh Torah, Human Dispositions 6-7

Shalom, my friend! So glad you're here to explore some timeless Jewish wisdom with me.

Hook

Ever feel like the people around you really shape who you are, for better or worse? Or maybe you've struggled with how to deal with someone who upset you, wondering if it's better to just keep quiet or speak up? Judaism has some incredibly practical advice for navigating our daily interactions and building a life of meaning and kindness. Today, we're diving into a classic Jewish text that offers a blueprint for creating positive relationships and becoming the best version of ourselves. Get ready for some insights that are surprisingly relevant, even centuries later!

Context

Let's get oriented before we jump into the text. Think of this as getting the "who, what, and where" of our learning journey.

Who wrote this?

This wisdom comes from a super famous Jewish scholar named Rambam. (That's just a Hebrew acronym for Rabbi Moshe ben Maimon, but everyone calls him Rambam!) He lived about 800 years ago in places like Spain and Egypt. He was a doctor, a philosopher, and one of the greatest Jewish thinkers ever. Imagine a brilliant polymath who also happened to organize all of Jewish law!

When was it written?

The Rambam completed this work in the late 12th century. So, we're talking about really ancient wisdom, but you'll see how fresh and relevant it still feels for our lives today. Good ideas don't expire, right?

Where is it from?

This specific teaching is from his massive work called Mishneh Torah. Think of it as a huge, organized encyclopedia of Jewish law, covering everything from holidays to how we treat our neighbors. It's a foundational text that's studied all over the world.

Key Term

As we go, you'll hear the word Halacha. Don't let it scare you! Halacha simply means practical Jewish law, like a guide for living. It's about how we put our values into action every single day.

Text Snapshot

Today, we're looking at a few powerful snippets from the Rambam's Mishneh Torah, specifically from the section on "Human Dispositions." He's basically giving us a masterclass in how to manage our character and interact with the world around us.

Here’s a taste of what he says:

"It is natural for a man's character and actions to be influenced by his friends and associates… Therefore, he should associate with the righteous and be constantly in the company of the wise, so as to learn from their deeds. Conversely, he should keep away from the wicked who walk in darkness…" (Mishneh Torah, Human Dispositions 6:1)

"Each man is commanded to love each and every one of Israel as himself as [Leviticus 19:18] states: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" (Mishneh Torah, Human Dispositions 7:3)

"A person who collects gossip about a colleague violates a prohibition as [Leviticus 19:16] states: 'Do not go around gossiping among your people.'" (Mishneh Torah, Human Dispositions 7:11)

You can find the full text and more at: https://www.sefaria.org/Mishneh_Torah%2C_Human_Dispositions_6-7

Close Reading

Let's unpack these ideas. The Rambam isn't just giving us rules; he's giving us a framework for a good life, rooted in human nature and divine wisdom.

Your Circle Shapes You

The Rambam kicks us off with a profound truth: "It is natural for a man's character and actions to be influenced by his friends and associates." (6:1) Think about it – we soak up the vibe of the people we spend time with, right? Whether it's their slang, their hobbies, or even their outlook on life, our "squad" leaves its mark. The commentator Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz notes that this isn't just a suggestion; it's "his habit is from his nature," meaning it's deeply ingrained in how we're built.

So, what's the wise move? "Therefore, he should associate with the righteous and be constantly in the company of the wise, so as to learn from their deeds." (6:1) This isn't about being exclusive or snobby, but about being intentional. If you want to be a kind person, hang out with kind people. If you want to learn, seek out teachers and smart friends. Rabbi Steinsaltz clarifies that "one who joins the wise will become wise, and the friend of fools will be harmed by their company." It's a clear cause-and-effect relationship.

But what if your whole environment is, well, not so great? The Rambam doesn't shy away from big solutions: "A person who lives in a place where the norms of behavior are evil... should move to a place where the people are righteous." (6:1) Sometimes, a change of scenery (and social circle) is exactly what we need. Of course, life isn't always that simple. What if you can't move, perhaps "because of bands of raiding troops" (6:1) – which Rabbi Steinsaltz explains means "danger in walking the roads" – or health reasons? The Rambam's advice is surprisingly radical: "he should remain alone in seclusion." (6:1) This isn't about giving up on humanity, but protecting your own soul and values. Rabbi Steinsaltz elaborates, saying it means "he should distance himself from the people of the country and not learn from their deeds." The goal is always to avoid negative influences and preserve your inner goodness, even if it means seeking "fortresses, protected places" (6:1, Steinsaltz). It's a powerful reminder that self-preservation of character is sometimes a solitary journey.

Love Is More Than a Feeling

Now, let's talk about the heart of Jewish living: "Each man is commanded to love each and every one of Israel as himself" (7:3), quoting the famous verse "Love your neighbor as yourself" from Leviticus 19:18. This isn't just a nice sentiment; it's a mitzvah – a divine command or good deed. How do we actually do this? The Rambam gets practical: "one should speak the praises of [others] and show concern for their money just as he is concerned with his own money and seeks his own honor." (7:3) Love isn't just a feeling; it's about valuing others' reputations, possessions, and dignity as much as your own.

And this love isn't just for people who look or act exactly like you. The Rambam specifically mentions "Loving a convert who has come to nestle under the wings of the Shechinah (God's presence in the world)." (7:4) He says this fulfills two commandments! Why the double emphasis? Because God Himself loves converts, as it says, "and He loves converts." (Deuteronomy 10:18). God wants us to have boundless love for them, just as we should for God. It's a powerful message of radical inclusivity – welcoming and embracing those who choose to join the Jewish people.

This spirit of care extends to the most vulnerable in society: "A person is obligated to show great care for orphans and widows because their spirits are very low and their feelings are depressed." (7:10) The Rambam emphasizes that this applies even if they are wealthy, because their emotional pain is real regardless of their financial status. We are commanded "not to mistreat any widow or orphan." (Exodus 22:21). How do we do this? "One should only speak to them gently and treat them only with honor. One should not cause pain to their persons with [overbearing] work or aggravate their feelings with harsh words and [one should] show more consideration for their financial interests than for one's own." (7:10) This is a deep sensitivity, recognizing their heightened emotional state. The text warns that anyone who vexes or angers them transgresses this prohibition. And the consequences? "I will display My anger and slay you with the sword." (Exodus 22:23) This isn't just about human justice; "There is a covenant between them and He who spoke and created the world that whenever they cry out because they have been wronged, they will be answered." (7:10) God is their ultimate protector, and messing with them is messing with God's own special concern.

Words Can Build or Break

Our words have incredible power, and the Rambam dedicates significant space to this. First, the inner world: "Whoever hates a [fellow] Jew in his heart transgresses a Torah (Jewish Bible, God's teaching) prohibition as [Leviticus 19:17] states: 'Do not hate your brother in your heart.'" (7:5) It's not enough to just act nice; our thoughts and feelings matter too.

But what if someone wrongs you? Don't stew in silence! The Rambam instructs us not to "remain silent and despise him" (7:6). Instead, "he is commanded to make the matter known and ask him: 'Why did you do this to me?'" (7:6), citing "You shall surely admonish your colleague." (Leviticus 19:17). The key is how you do it. "He should speak to him patiently and gently, informing him that he is only making these statements for his colleague's own welfare." (7:7) The goal is always to help, not to hurt. And a huge no-no? Embarrassment. "it is forbidden for a person to embarrass a [fellow] Jew. How much more so [is it forbidden to embarrass him] in public." (7:8) Public embarrassment is considered a "great sin," so severe that "A person who embarrasses a colleague in public does not have a share in the world to come." (7:8) Ouch! This highlights the immense value Judaism places on human dignity.

And then there's Lashon Hara – harmful speech, like gossip. "Do not go around gossiping among your people." (7:11) This isn't just rude; it's a "severe sin" that "can cause the death of many Jews." The Rambam states that even if the statements are true, they "bring about the destruction of the world." (7:12) He calls lashon hara "a much more serious sin" than simple gossip, comparing it to idol worship, forbidden sexual relations, and murder! (7:13) It's so bad, our Sages said "Anyone who speaks lashon horah is like one who denies God." (7:13) And it doesn't just hurt the person being spoken about; "Lashon horah kills three [people], the one who speaks it, the one who listens to it, and the one about whom it is spoken." (7:14) Even "the dust of lashon horah" – subtle hints, backhanded compliments, or speaking favorably to enemies – is forbidden (7:14). It teaches us to be incredibly mindful of every word we utter.

Finally, the Rambam tackles revenge and grudges. "Do not take revenge" (7:15) and "Do not bear a grudge against the children of your people." (7:16) He gives examples: refusing to lend someone a tool because they refused you, or lending it with a snarky comment about how you're "not like them." These are forbidden. Instead, you should "give it to him with a full heart, without repaying him for what he did." (7:15) And for a grudge, you must "wipe the matter from your heart and never bring it to mind." (7:16) This is about true forgiveness, clearing the slate completely for a healthy, stable community.

Apply It

This week, let's try a simple, powerful practice based on the Rambam's wisdom about speaking well of others.

For just one minute a day, pick one person you interact with – a family member, a colleague, a friend, or even someone you just pass by. Before you see them, or after you've spoken, take a moment to think of one positive quality or action of theirs. Then, if you have the opportunity, find a way to express that genuine compliment to them directly. It could be as simple as, "That was a really helpful suggestion you made in the meeting," or "I appreciate how you always remember to ask about my day." If expressing it directly isn't feasible, just thinking the positive thought is a great start. This small act can shift your perspective and build a more loving environment, one positive word at a time.

Chevruta Mini

Here are a couple of questions to ponder, maybe with a friend, or just with yourself!

1. The Rambam says our friends and environment deeply influence us. Can you think of a time when your "circle" really helped you grow or, conversely, held you back? What did you learn from that experience?
2. The lesson highlights how powerful our words are, especially regarding gossip and embarrassment. What's one practical step you could take this week to be more mindful and positive in your speech?

Takeaway

Remember this: Your choices in who you surround yourself with, how you act with love, and the care you put into your words and actions are foundational to living a truly good and meaningful Jewish life.