I Samuel 6:14-9:1

Okay, deep breaths! We're diving into a rich chunk of I Samuel today, and it's packed with lessons for us as parents. Remember, we're aiming for "good enough" and celebrating the small wins in the beautiful, messy journey of raising kids. Let's make this 15 minutes count!

Insight

This portion of I Samuel is a wild ride, isn't it? We start with the Philistines, who are dealing with the highly inconvenient and frankly terrifying presence of the Ark of God. They've tried to get rid of it, but it seems to be causing them no end of trouble – plagues, tumors, and mice! They consult their wise men, who, in a moment of surprising clarity, tell them to send the Ark back with an indemnity – essentially, a "sorry we messed with you" gift. They even suggest making golden models of the offending mice and tumors as a way to "honor" the God of Israel. This is a fantastic, albeit slightly bizarre, metaphor for acknowledging the impact of our actions, especially when we've caused harm or disruption.

Think about it this way: the Philistines didn't just shove the Ark back without any thought. They recognized that their actions had consequences, and they attempted to make amends. This is such a crucial lesson for us as parents. Our kids are going to make mistakes, and sometimes, those mistakes will have ripple effects. They might hurt someone's feelings, break something, or simply cause a mess. Our job isn't to shame them into oblivion, but to help them understand that actions have consequences and that sometimes, making amends is necessary. The Philistines' "golden mice and tumors" are a humorous, albeit primitive, way of saying, "We recognize this is a problem, and we're trying to show we understand."

The text then describes the ingenious (and divinely guided!) experiment: two milk cows, unyoked, hitched to a cart, with their calves penned up. The idea is that if the Ark is truly causing these plagues, the cows, driven by maternal instinct, will head away from their calves and towards Israel, not towards their own calves. It's a test of divine will. And what happens? The cows, defying all natural inclinations, head straight for Beth-Shemesh, the Ark on their backs. This is a powerful reminder that sometimes, we need to trust in a higher power, or simply in the natural flow of things, to guide us. As parents, we can over-engineer, over-plan, and over-worry. Sometimes, we just need to set things in motion and trust that, with a little guidance and a lot of love, our children will find their way.

The people of Beth-Shemesh, upon seeing the Ark, rejoice. They even offer the cows as a burnt offering and sacrifice to God. This is a moment of relief and celebration. However, the story quickly takes a sharp turn. The people of Beth-Shemesh, in their excitement and perhaps a bit of curiosity, look into the Ark. This is a huge no-no. The text states that God struck down seventy men – a devastating loss. This part is frankly terrifying, and it’s easy to recoil from it. But let's try to extract a parental lesson here, not about divine punishment, but about boundaries and respect.

The Ark represents something sacred, something that requires reverence and a specific kind of engagement. Looking into it inappropriately is like a child disrespecting a sacred space or a sacred object. For us, this translates to teaching our children about boundaries, about respecting personal space, and about understanding that some things are not for them to pry into or touch without permission. The consequence for the people of Beth-Shemesh was dire, and while we don't inflict such punishments, the principle of respecting what is sacred or private is vital. It’s about teaching them that some doors are closed, some conversations are private, and some places are off-limits. This isn't about control for control's sake, but about safety and respect for the spiritual and emotional well-being of themselves and others.

The Ark is then moved to Kiriath-Jearim, and it stays there for twenty years. During this time, the text says, "all the House of Israel yearned after God." This is a beautiful, quiet period of longing and introspection. It’s during this time that Samuel, a pivotal figure, steps forward. He tells the Israelites that if they want to return to God, they need to get rid of their idols and focus on serving God alone. This is a powerful message about spiritual purity and commitment.

As parents, we are often the spiritual guides for our children, whether we realize it or not. We set the tone for their understanding of faith, values, and what is truly important. The Philistines’ attempt at appeasement, the cows’ journey, the tragic incident at Beth-Shemesh, and then the twenty years of yearning – all these events build up to a moment of collective spiritual awareness. Samuel’s call to remove "alien gods" and "Ashtaroth" is a call to simplify, to focus, and to dedicate oneself to what is truly meaningful. For us, this might mean identifying the "idols" in our own lives and in our children's lives – excessive screen time, materialism, a focus on superficial achievements – and consciously choosing to prioritize our relationship with God and with each other. It’s about teaching our children to discern what is truly valuable from what is fleeting and ultimately empty.

The text then describes a pivotal moment: the people demand a king. Samuel is not happy about this. He prays to God, and God tells him, "Heed the demand of the people in everything they say to you. For it is not you that they have rejected; it is Me they have rejected to rule over them." This is a profound insight into human nature and our relationship with the divine. The people aren't just asking for a king; they're expressing a desire to be like other nations, to have someone external to lead them, rather than relying on God's direct guidance. They are, in essence, rejecting God's kingship over them.

This is a tough but important parallel for parenting. Sometimes, our children, in their desire for independence or to fit in with their peers, will make choices that seem to reject our guidance or the values we've tried to instill. They might say, "I want to do this because everyone else is doing it," or "Why can't I have this when so-and-so has it?" This can feel like a personal rejection. But just as God tells Samuel, it's often not about rejecting us personally, but about them asserting their own desires, exploring their own paths, and sometimes, wrestling with their own desires for autonomy. Our role is to guide, to warn, and to love them through this process, even when it's difficult.

God then instructs Samuel to warn them about the practices of kings: conscription of sons, taking of fields, taxes, and enslaving people. This is a stark reminder of the potential downsides of placing ultimate authority in human hands. It’s a warning about the burdens of leadership and the potential for exploitation. As parents, we are also leaders in our children's lives. We have the responsibility to lead with integrity, to be mindful of the impact of our decisions on them, and to avoid the pitfalls of "taking" from them in ways that are not for their ultimate good. We need to be aware of how our own actions, our own "reign" in the household, might affect them.

Despite Samuel’s warnings, the people insist. They want a king to "fight our battles." This desire for external solutions is very human. And God, in His infinite patience and wisdom, tells Samuel to appoint a king. This leads us to the introduction of Saul, a handsome, tall man from the tribe of Benjamin, whose father’s donkeys have gone astray. The irony is beautiful: the man chosen to be king is initially on a mundane errand, looking for lost donkeys. This is a wonderful reminder that greatness often emerges from the ordinary, and that our children, even in their seemingly insignificant moments, are on their own journeys of discovery.

Saul and his servant are looking for the donkeys and are advised to seek out a "seer" (which we learn is an older term for a prophet). They meet young women drawing water, who direct them to Samuel. The servant’s practical suggestion of giving the seer a small piece of silver to gain his attention is relatable. It shows a desire to make the most of the situation, even with limited resources. Saul’s humility is also evident when he worries about what they can bring as a gift.

The encounter with Samuel is fascinating. Samuel, having been divinely forewarned about Saul, recognizes him immediately. He tells Saul, "I am the seer." He also reassures Saul about the lost donkeys and then drops a bombshell: "And for whom is all Israel yearning, if not for you and all your ancestral house?" Saul’s humble response, "But I am only a Benjaminite, from the smallest of the tribes of Israel..." highlights his self-awareness and his lack of pretension. He doesn't see himself as destined for greatness.

The meal with Samuel is also significant. Samuel sets aside a special portion for Saul, indicating divine favor and a recognition of his destined role. The conversation on the roof, and Samuel’s subsequent declaration of "the word of God" to Saul, marks the formal beginning of Saul's journey as king. This journey, as we know from later in Samuel, will be fraught with challenges.

For us as parents, this entire narrative is a rich tapestry of lessons. It’s about acknowledging consequences, making amends, trusting the process, respecting boundaries, clarifying our priorities, understanding human nature's longing for external solutions, and recognizing that greatness can emerge from the most unexpected places and people. The story of the Ark and the rise of Saul is not just ancient history; it's a mirror reflecting our own lives, our own struggles, and our own potential for growth as we navigate the beautiful, sometimes chaotic, journey of Jewish parenting. We are called to be wise guides, loving mentors, and steadfast models of faith, even when the donkeys are lost and the path ahead is uncertain.

Text Snapshot

The Philistines, struggling with the consequences of their actions, ask their wise men: "If you are going to send the Ark of the God of Israel away, do not send it away without anything; you must also pay an indemnity. Then you will be healed, and he will be made known to you; otherwise his hand will not turn away from you.” (I Samuel 6:14-15) This highlights the importance of acknowledging harm and making amends, even in the face of divine judgment.

Later, when the people of Israel demand a king, God tells Samuel: "Heed the demand of the people in everything they say to you. For it is not you that they have rejected; it is Me they have rejected to rule over them." (I Samuel 8:7) This reminds us that our children's desires and demands are not always personal rejections of our guidance, but sometimes expressions of their own journey and a yearning for autonomy.

Activity

The "Golden Offering" Gratitude Jar

Goal: To practice acknowledging positive actions and expressing gratitude, mirroring the Philistines' (albeit forced) attempt to appease and honor.

Time: 10 minutes

Materials:

• A clean jar or container (e.g., an empty coffee can, a glass jar)
• Small slips of paper
• Pens or markers

Instructions for Parents:

1. Introduction (2 minutes): Gather your child(ren) and explain that today, we're going to create a "Golden Offering" Gratitude Jar. Remind them of the story of the Ark and the Philistines. You can say something like: "Remember how the Philistines had to send the Ark back with a special gift, like golden mice and tumors, to show they understood they'd caused a problem? Well, we’re going to make our own kind of golden offering, but instead of being sorry for causing trouble, we're going to celebrate all the good things that happen!"

2. Brainstorming "Golden Offerings" (3 minutes): Ask your child(ren) to think about things that made them feel good, happy, or appreciative today, or this week. Prompt them with questions like:

   • "What was something nice someone did for you?"
   • "What's something you did that made you feel proud?"
   • "What's something you're thankful for right now?"
   • "What's something funny or joyful that happened?"
   • "What's a skill you used that you're happy about?"

   If you have younger children, focus on concrete actions and simple feelings. For older children, you can encourage more abstract thoughts about character traits or relationships.

3. Writing the "Offerings" (3 minutes):

   • Give each child a few slips of paper and a pen.
   • Have them write down one "golden offering" on each slip. For younger children who can't write, you can write for them, or they can draw a picture representing the offering.
   • Examples of "Golden Offerings":
     • "Mommy read me an extra story."
     • "My friend shared their toy."
     • "I helped clean up the kitchen."
     • "My brother made me laugh."
     • "I finally learned to tie my shoes!"
     • "Dad made pancakes for breakfast."
     • "I felt brave trying a new food."
     • "The sun is shining today."

4. Depositing the Offerings (1 minute): Once they have written or drawn their offerings, have each child fold their slips of paper and place them into the gratitude jar.

5. Closing (1 minute): Seal the jar (or just place the lid on). Explain that this jar is now full of "golden offerings" – moments of goodness, kindness, and joy. You can decide as a family when you'll open it and read the offerings aloud – maybe at dinner, before bed, or on a specific day of the week. The act of creating the jar together is the primary "offering" for this activity, acknowledging the good in your shared experience.

Parental Empathy Note: If your child struggles to think of things, or if the mood feels heavy, that's okay. Don't push. You can model by writing down a few of your own "golden offerings" for them to see. The goal is to introduce the concept of gratitude and positive acknowledgment, not to force perfection. Even the attempt to find something good is a micro-win!

Script

Navigating the "Why Can't I Do That?" Question

Scenario: Your child sees a friend doing something that's against your family's rules or values, and they ask, "Why can't I do that too?"

(Approx. 30 seconds)

Parent: "Oh, that's a great question. It's totally normal to see what your friends are doing and wonder why you have different rules." (Pause for child to nod or respond) "You know, just like the people in our story had different rulers and different ways of living, our family has its own way of doing things." (Connect to the text briefly) "Sometimes, the rules we have are because we care about keeping you safe, or because we believe in certain values, like being honest or being kind. It's not that what your friend is doing is necessarily 'bad,' but it might not be the best fit for our family right now. We're building our own special team here, and our rules help us do that. Does that make a little sense?"

Why this works:

• Acknowledges the feeling: "It's totally normal to see..." validates their perspective.
• Connects to the text: A subtle nod to the story of different nations and rulers provides a relatable, larger context.
• Focuses on "our family": Emphasizes collective values and decisions, not just arbitrary parental decrees.
• Explains the "why" (briefly): Mentions safety, values, or "best fit" without getting into a lengthy lecture.
• Uses positive framing: "Building our own special team" makes it sound like a shared project.
• Ends with a question: Encourages dialogue and checks for understanding, rather than shutting down the conversation.
• No guilt: Avoids implying the child is wrong for asking or that their friends are "bad."

Habit

The "Divine Whispers" Check-in

Goal: To cultivate a practice of listening for God's guidance in everyday moments, inspired by Samuel receiving divine messages.

Micro-Habit: Once a day, for one week, take 30 seconds to pause and ask yourself, "What might God be whispering to me right now?" This could be a feeling, an intuition, an idea, or even just a sense of peace or unease.

How to Practice:

1. Choose your moment: This could be during your morning coffee, while commuting, during a quiet moment before bed, or even while doing a mundane chore.
2. Set a timer (optional): If you tend to get lost in thought, setting a gentle timer for 30 seconds can be helpful.
3. Ask the question: Silently or softly, ask yourself, "What might God be whispering to me right now?"
4. Listen: Don't force an answer. Just be open to whatever comes. It might be a thought about your child, a feeling about a situation, a reminder of a value, or just a sense of presence.
5. Acknowledge: Simply notice what you heard or felt. You don't need to act on it immediately, or even at all. The practice is in the listening.

Why this is a micro-habit:

• Time-boxed: Strictly 30 seconds.
• Low barrier to entry: Requires no special tools or preparation.
• Focuses on receptivity: Mirrors Samuel's role as someone who received divine messages.
• Builds self-awareness: Encourages introspection and connection to something larger.
• No guilt: If you miss a day, or if you don't "hear" anything profound, that's perfectly okay. The intention to listen is the win.

Parental Empathy Note: This habit is about cultivating a sense of connection and openness, not about achieving prophetic abilities. It’s about reminding ourselves that we are not alone in our parenting journey and that there are subtle ways we can connect with divine wisdom. Don't judge your "hearings." Sometimes, it's just a gentle nudge to be patient, or a reminder to take a deep breath. Those are divine whispers too.

Takeaway

Our journey through this part of I Samuel reminds us that parenting is a constant dance between acknowledging consequences, making amends, trusting in a process larger than ourselves, and holding sacred boundaries with love. Like the Philistines grappling with the Ark, we too face challenges that demand our attention and a willingness to adjust our approach. We learn from Samuel that true connection comes from focusing on what is truly divine, shedding the distractions of "alien gods" in our lives, and dedicating ourselves to our core values. And in the seemingly ordinary search for lost donkeys, we see that destiny can find us in unexpected moments, calling us to embrace roles we never imagined. This week, let's embrace the "good enough" tries, celebrate the small acts of connection and gratitude, and listen for those quiet "divine whispers" that guide us through the beautiful chaos of raising our families. You're doing great!