The Enduring Melody of the Intermediate Soul: A Prayer-Through-Music Guide

Hook

There's a quiet strength that hums beneath the surface of our most demanding days, a melody of persistent striving. It's the song of the intermediate soul, a deep, resonant chord struck in the space between our highest spiritual aspirations and the undeniable pull of earthly desires. This isn't a mood of ecstatic transcendence, nor one of despairing resignation. Rather, it is a mood of profound, unwavering vigilance and conscious choice—a steady commitment to presence, even when the inner landscape shifts and challenges arise. It's the daily heroism of choosing light over shadow, intention over impulse, again and again.

In the vast symphony of human experience, we often seek grand, sweeping crescendos of spiritual revelation. Yet, much of our inner work unfolds in the subtle, sustained notes of discipline and redirection. This is the realm of the benoni, the intermediate person, as described in the profound teachings of the Tanya. They are not defined by an absence of challenge, but by an unyielding refusal to surrender their inner city to forces that would diminish their divine purpose. They embody the delicate yet powerful dance between what reawakens within us and how we choose to respond.

Imagine a single, resilient tree standing firm against a changing wind. Its roots hold deep, its branches sway, yet its trunk remains unyielding. This is the posture of the benoni—a soul rooted in divine purpose, whose leaves may rustle with passing temptations, but whose core remains unbroken. It’s a powerful, grounding image for anyone navigating the complexities of their own inner world, where the echoes of prayer might fade, and the clamor of the mundane might rise. How do we sustain the resonance of our deepest intentions when the "after-prayer" reality sets in? How do we keep our "small city" aligned with holiness, even when desires for the world's delights begin to stir?

This journey of internal navigation, of maintaining equilibrium amidst flux, finds a powerful ally in music. Music, in its very structure, mirrors the rhythms of this inner work. It offers a sustained breath, a framework for intention, and a vehicle for the intellectual resolve that guides the heart. We don't just hear music; we embody it. Its patterns can become the patterns of our thought, its harmonies the alignment of our will. For the benoni, music is not just an adornment to prayer, but a living, breathing extension of it—a tool to bridge the gap between the sublime moments of connection and the everyday demands of self-mastery. It’s a way to keep the inner "garments" of the divine soul brightly woven, even when the fabric of our emotional landscape feels frayed or challenged. Through melody, we can cultivate the steadfastness, the discernment, and the compassionate firmness that defines this profound spiritual state. It is a promise that even when the Supernal Intellect departs, the melody of our commitment can remain, a silent anchor in the soul.

Text Snapshot

Let us lean into the wisdom of the Tanya, allowing these chosen lines to resonate as a prelude to our musical prayer:

"Only the three ‘garments’ of the divine soul, they alone are implemented in the body, being the thought, speech, and act engaged in the 613 commandments of the Torah."

"However, after prayer, when the state of sublimity of the Intellect... departs, the evil in the left part reawakens, and he begins to feel a desire for the lusts of the world and its delights."

"Yet, because the evil has not the sole authority and dominion over the “city,” it is unable to carry out this desire from the potential into the actual..."

"...each person may, with the willpower in his brain, restrain himself and control the drive of lust that is in his heart, preventing his heart’s desires from expressing themselves in action, word, or thought..."

"...no sooner does it reach there than he thrusts it out with both hands and averts his mind from it the instant he reminds himself that it is an evil thought, refusing to accept it willingly..."

These lines paint a vivid picture of the benoni's inner world, a microcosm of the human spirit engaged in continuous spiritual work. We encounter powerful imagery and profound sound words that echo the internal struggle and the potential for mastery.

The phrase "garments of the divine soul" evokes a sense of spiritual attire, tangible expressions of our higher self. These are not hidden qualities, but active manifestations—thought, speech, and act—that clothe our being in holiness. It suggests intentionality, a conscious dressing of our inner and outer selves in purpose. The "divine soul" itself hums with inherent goodness, a constant aspiration towards the 613 commandments, a symphony of divine will.

Then comes the pivot: "after prayer... the evil in the left part reawakens." This isn't a whisper; it's a reawakening, a stirring, a resonant chord of desire that vibrates through the being. The "left part" is a specific locus, a place where the animal soul resides, and its reawakening is not a gentle stirring but a palpable surge of "lusts of the world and its delights." It's the sound of the mundane calling, the siren song of immediate gratification, a powerful counterpoint to the sublime harmonies of prayer. This isn't a condemnation, but an honest acknowledgment of our dual nature, a recognition that the echo of holiness can sometimes be overshadowed by the clamor of earthly cravings.

Crucially, the text asserts: "evil has not the sole authority and dominion over the 'city'." The "city" is our self, our entire being, and the sound here is one of restraint, of a boundary being held. The desire may reawaken, it may even feel strong, but it lacks the ultimate power to dictate action. This is the sound of a gate holding fast, a defense line unbroken. It's the quiet triumph of an inner constitution that prevents potential from becoming actual, a silent veto over the clamor of impulse.

The subsequent declaration, "each person may, with the willpower in his brain, restrain himself and control the drive of lust that is in his heart," introduces the mechanism of this control. Here we hear the decisive click of willpower, the firm grip of the brain over the heart. "Restrain" and "control" are active verbs, implying a conscious engagement, a deliberate shaping of internal energy. The "drive of lust" is presented as a powerful, almost primal force, a surging current that requires a strong hand on the rudder. This isn't a passive surrender to fate, but an active, moment-by-moment assertion of inner governance. It’s the sound of choice, clear and unwavering.

Finally, the instruction to "thrusts it out with both hands and averts his mind from it the instant he reminds himself that it is an evil thought, refusing to accept it willingly" speaks to an immediate, almost visceral action. "Thrusts it out" is not a gentle push; it's a forceful rejection, a decisive dismissal. "Averts his mind" is a turning away, a redirection of focus, an immediate shift in attention. The "instant he reminds himself" highlights the quickness, the lack of deliberation permitted to the negative thought. This is the sound of a sharp, clear chord of self-awareness, an immediate correction that reestablishes harmony. It's the sound of a mind asserting its inherent authority, refusing to indulge, refusing to entertain, refusing to allow even a moment's willing play with what diminishes. This text is not about escaping the human condition, but about mastering it, note by note, choice by choice.

Close Reading

The Tanya's description of the benoni offers a profoundly realistic and empowering framework for understanding our inner lives. It moves beyond simplistic notions of good and evil, painting a nuanced picture of an individual engaged in a perpetual, yet ultimately victorious, internal dance. For the prayer-through-music guide, this text is a rich tapestry of emotional and psychological insights, inviting us to attune our inner ears to the subtle frequencies of self-mastery. We will explore two key insights regarding emotion regulation, drawing out their depth and practical application.

Insight 1: The Rhythmic Breath of Awareness and Return (The "After Prayer" Reality)

The text's most striking and perhaps most liberating insight into emotion regulation is its candid acknowledgment of the "after prayer" reality. "However, after prayer, when the state of sublimity of the Intellect... departs, the evil in the left part reawakens, and he begins to feel a desire for the lusts of the world and its delights." This is not a failure; it is a fundamental aspect of the human condition, a natural rhythm of spiritual life. We spend precious moments in deep communion, elevating our consciousness, binding our chabad (intellectual faculties) to the greatness of the En Sof. During these times, the "burning love" in the right part of the heart is revealed, shining brightly, nullifying the evil in the left. We feel connected, pure, aligned.

But the Tanya is unflinchingly honest: this state of revealed love and sublime intellect is not permanent. It "departs." And when it does, the "evil in the left part reawakens." This reawakening is not a sign of spiritual weakness or inadequacy. It is the natural consequence of being embodied beings, living in a world of physical sensations, desires, and challenges. To pretend that these desires vanish forever after a moment of spiritual elevation would be a form of toxic positivity, an unrealistic expectation that sets us up for disappointment and self-judgment. The benoni is not someone who never feels desire, but someone who understands its cyclical nature and has developed a sophisticated, active response to its resurgence.

The genius of this teaching lies in its validation of this ongoing struggle. It normalizes the experience of spiritual ebb and flow. Just as the tide recedes only to return, so too do our desires for mundane pleasures resurface after moments of profound spiritual connection. The benoni's mastery is not in preventing the tide from returning, but in refusing to be swept away by it. This is a crucial distinction. Emotion regulation, in this context, is not about eradicating emotion or desire, but about managing its influence, particularly its power to translate into unholy thought, speech, or action.

The text subtly introduces the concept of "hidden love" that remains even when the "burning love" is not in a revealed state. This "natural adoration in the divine soul" serves as the bedrock upon which the benoni's resilience is built. It’s a constant, underlying hum of connection, a spiritual anchor that holds firm even when the surface waters are turbulent. This hidden love is the wellspring of the "willpower in his brain" that enables him to "restrain himself and control the drive of lust that is in his heart." It's a deep, abiding commitment to holiness that persists even when the emotional fervor of prayer has subsided.

This leads us to the core mechanism of emotion regulation for the benoni: active, conscious redirection. The desires reawaken, yes, and they can be forceful enough to rise to the mind, distracting from Torah and Divine service. The text even states, "sinful thoughts, which are more serious than actual sin." This highlights the internal battlefield, emphasizing that the struggle is often fought and won (or lost) in the realm of thought. The benoni doesn't allow these thoughts to linger or to be entertained "willingly." Instead, he "thrusts it out with both hands and averts his mind from it the instant he reminds himself that it is an evil thought, refusing to accept it willingly, even to let his thoughts play on it willingly."

This is not mere suppression, which can often lead to a boomerang effect where repressed emotions resurface with greater intensity. Rather, it is a conscious, decisive act of redirection. Imagine a river that, after a powerful storm, threatens to overflow its banks. The benoni doesn't try to stop the water entirely (which is impossible), but rather actively strengthens the levees and diverts the flow into beneficial channels. The "willpower in his brain" acts as a conscious guide, acknowledging the reawakened desire but immediately choosing a different path for the mind's engagement. This is the essence of building spiritual muscle memory. Each time one "prevails and triumph[s] over this evil of passionate craving," they strengthen their capacity for future regulation. It's a continuous process of exercising spiritual discernment and choice, gradually reinforcing the brain's innate capacity to rule over the heart.

This insight teaches us that spiritual growth is less about achieving a permanent state of blissful perfection and more about cultivating a consistent practice of awareness, choice, and return. It's a rhythmic breath of spiritual life: inhale connection, exhale grounding; inhale aspiration, exhale redirection. The benoni's strength lies not in the absence of struggle, but in the unwavering commitment to engage in it, knowing that the hidden love and the power of intellect provide the tools for constant triumph. It's a lived wisdom that understands that the journey is the destination, and each conscious choice is a step closer to embodying divine will. It invites us to be compassionate with ourselves when desires resurface, but firm in our resolve to guide our inner city towards holiness.

Insight 2: The Sovereignty of Intellect (Light Over Darkness)

The second profound insight into emotion regulation offered by the Tanya's description of the benoni centers on the inherent, almost automatic, power of the intellect to dispel negative thoughts and desires. This is beautifully encapsulated in the verse from Ecclesiastes: "Then I saw that wisdom surpasses folly as light surpasses darkness." This metaphor is not incidental; it is foundational to the benoni's spiritual psychology. Just as physical light doesn't fight darkness—it simply is, and darkness inevitably recedes in its presence—so too does the "wisdom that is in the divine soul in the brain" inherently overpower the "foolishness of the kelipah."

This insight offers a powerful reframe of our internal struggles. It suggests that the battle between good and evil, wisdom and folly, is not a contest of equal forces in the benoni's mind. Rather, the divine intellect possesses an innate superiority, a natural dominion. The "spirit of folly" that leads to sin is not an indomitable enemy, but something that is "inevitably driven away by the wisdom that is in the divine soul in the brain." This is a crucial distinction. It's not about a grueling, exhausting fight where victory is uncertain. It's about recognizing and activating an inherent power that will prevail.

The key, then, is engagement. The intellect's power isn't passive; it must be brought to bear. When a "wicked thought" or a "lust for all material things" rises from the heart to the brain, the benoni's response is immediate and definitive: "no sooner does it reach there than he thrusts it out with both hands and averts his mind from it the instant he reminds himself that it is an evil thought, refusing to accept it willingly, even to let his thoughts play on it willingly." This isn't a long, drawn-out internal debate. It's a swift, surgical strike. The moment the thought is identified as "evil" or diminishing, it is rejected. This speaks to a highly developed spiritual reflex, a mental agility that does not allow negative impulses to gain purchase.

This immediate rejection is not about suppression in a harmful sense, but about conscious disengagement and active redirection of attention. The benoni understands that where attention goes, energy flows. By refusing to "accept it willingly" or "let his thoughts play on it willingly," he starves the negative thought of the fuel it needs to grow. Instead, he diverts his attention "altogether from the craving of his heart toward the completely opposite direction, particularly in the direction of holiness." This is a powerful act of self-authorship, choosing the narrative and focus of one's inner life. It's a proactive cultivation of a mental environment that automatically favors light and elevates purpose.

This principle extends beyond personal desires to interpersonal relationships, offering a profound model for ethical conduct and emotional maturity. The text describes how, "as soon as there rises from his heart to his mind some animosity or hatred, G–d forbid, or jealousy or anger, or a grudge and suchlike, he gives them no entrance into his mind and will." Again, the emphasis is on immediate, decisive rejection at the mental level. The benoni doesn't pretend these feelings don't arise. They are acknowledged as rising from the heart. But they are denied entry into the mind's "will," the seat of conscious choice and action.

Instead, "his mind exercises its authority and power over the spirit in his heart to do the very opposite and to conduct himself toward his neighbor with the quality of kindness and a display of abundant love." This is where the benoni's spiritual prowess truly shines. It's not just about stopping negative behavior; it's about actively generating positive, loving action in its place. The example of Joseph, who repaid his offenders with favors, is not merely an ideal; it is presented as an attainable path for the benoni. This moves beyond mere emotion regulation to active emotional transformation. The intellect, guided by divine wisdom, doesn't just suppress anger; it actively cultivates kindness and abundant love, to the extent of "suffering from him to the extreme limits without becoming provoked into anger, G–d forbid, or to revenge in kind."

This level of self-mastery is a testament to the enduring power of conscious choice and the cultivation of an inner landscape where the light of wisdom is always given precedence. It implies a deeply ingrained spiritual discipline, where the mind is trained to act as a benevolent sovereign over the emotional impulses of the heart. The "light over darkness" metaphor thus becomes a lived reality, a constant affirmation that even the faintest glimmer of divine wisdom is enough to dispel vast amounts of folly, provided we choose to illuminate our inner world with it. The benoni's path is one of profound inner freedom, not because they are free from desires or negative impulses, but because they are masters of their response, ever choosing the path of light, kindness, and holiness. This is a powerful blueprint for anyone seeking to live a life of integrity, compassion, and sustained spiritual purpose.

Melody Cue

Music is the soul's native language, a direct conduit to the inner landscape the Tanya so meticulously describes. For the benoni, a niggun (a wordless melody) can become a living prayer, a vibrational anchor for the intellect's sovereignty and the heart's yearning. We will explore three melodic approaches, each tuned to a different facet of the benoni's journey, offering distinct emotional and spiritual resonance.

For the "After Prayer" Reawakening/Striving: The Niggun of Resilient Return

This niggun addresses the honest reality of desires reawakening after moments of spiritual elevation. It acknowledges the ebb and flow, the feeling of the "Supernal Intellect" departing, and the subsequent stirring of "lusts of the world." The melody here should embody a sense of hopeful resilience, a deep-seated commitment that persists despite the shifting inner tides.

• Melodic Characteristics: Imagine a niggun that begins with a sustained, reflective note, perhaps in a minor key or a modal flavor (like Phrygian or Dorian) that hints at introspection or a gentle yearning. This opening phrase is slow, pensive, allowing space for the acknowledgment of the reawakening desire—not with despair, but with gentle awareness. It might descend slightly, mirroring the "departing" state, or hold a sustained, almost questioning tone.
• Transition and Development: This initial contemplative phase then resolves into a more determined, rhythmic, and steadily ascending major-key section. The transition should feel like a conscious shift, a gathering of internal strength. The rhythm becomes more regular, perhaps a gentle march or a flowing, consistent pulse, symbolizing the "willpower in his brain" taking hold. The ascending melody represents the act of "restraining himself and control[ling] the drive of lust," a conscious upward movement towards holiness. It's not a sudden burst of energy, but a sustained, quiet power, a consistent re-orientation.
• Musical Reasoning: The initial minor/modal quality validates the experience of temporary spiritual dips and the re-emergence of worldly pulls. It allows for honest feeling, avoiding any "toxic positivity." The resolution into a major, rhythmic phrase signifies the intellect's inherent capacity for control and redirection, the "hidden love" that grounds the benoni. The steady rhythm reinforces the idea of persistent striving, a continuous effort rather than a one-time battle. It’s the melody of saying, "Yes, this feeling has returned, but I remain steadfast in my purpose." It acknowledges the challenge and immediately offers a musical path to resolute re-engagement. This niggun is a sonic embrace of the journey, not just the destination, reminding us that resilience is a beautiful, ongoing song.

For the "Light Over Darkness" / Immediate Rejection: The Niggun of Clear Assertion

This niggun captures the instantaneous nature of the benoni's response to negative thoughts and impulses, the decisive act of "thrust[ing] it out with both hands" and averting the mind. It embodies the principle that "wisdom surpasses folly as light surpasses darkness," implying a swift, almost effortless dispelling of negativity once the intellect asserts itself.

• Melodic Characteristics: This melody should be clear, decisive, and almost sharp in its initial phrase, followed by a strong, unwavering, and uplifting resolution. It might begin with a quick, almost staccato or accented opening—a percussive "no" in musical form. Imagine a crisp, short motif, perhaps a descending interval or a pointed, singular note, immediately followed by a powerful, soaring ascent. The melody should then broaden into a confident, expansive, and major-key theme, perhaps with sustained, rich harmonies, signifying the triumph of light.
• Structure and Flow: The initial "thrusting out" phrase is quick, leaving little room for dwelling. It's a musical declaration of boundaries. The subsequent soaring melody is not about battling the darkness, but about being the light. It's an expression of the inherent superiority of wisdom, a confident assertion of divine presence. The melody should feel unburdened, clear, and bright, reflecting the immediate clarity that comes from rejecting folly.
• Musical Reasoning: The staccato or accented opening musically articulates the "instant" rejection, the refusal to "accept it willingly." It's a sonic representation of a firm boundary being drawn. The subsequent soaring, major-key melody reflects the natural power of the divine soul to banish darkness effortlessly once engaged. It’s not a melody of struggle, but of inherent authority and luminous presence. This niggun is a sonic affirmation of our capacity for immediate, decisive choice, reminding us that we don't have to entertain every thought that arises; we have the power to "thrust it out" and re-center in divine wisdom. It's the sound of asserting our inner sovereignty, of choosing light, and letting its brilliance dissolve the shadows.

For the "Sovereignty of Intellect" / Cultivating Kindness: The Niggun of Abundant Love

This melody focuses on the benoni's proactive redirection of negative impulses towards positive action, particularly in interpersonal relations. When animosity or anger arises, the mind "exercises its authority and power over the spirit in his heart to do the very opposite and to conduct himself toward his neighbor with the quality of kindness and a display of abundant love." This niggun should foster open-heartedness, compassion, and a deep, expansive sense of universal love.

• Melodic Characteristics: This niggun should be gentle, expansive, and deeply loving. It might begin with a sustained, warm, and flowing melody, perhaps in a major key or a gentle Lydian mode, emphasizing openness and generosity. The notes should be smooth and connected, flowing into one another like a gentle stream. The melody could feature rising intervals that convey a sense of offering or reaching out, and then resolve into comforting, harmonious chords that evoke peace and acceptance.
• Structure and Flow: The melody should invite internal reflection and the conscious cultivation of positive intention. It’s not about quick rejection, but about a deliberate, heartfelt embrace of kindness. The sustained notes allow for the slow, intentional infusion of love into the heart, moving beyond mere absence of negativity to active, abundant goodness. It should feel like a deep, reassuring breath, expanding the heart with compassion.
• Musical Reasoning: The gentle, flowing nature of the melody encourages empathy and a softening of the heart, counteracting any rising animosity. The sustained notes provide space for the intellect to consciously direct the heart towards "kindness and a display of abundant love." The expansive harmonies musically represent the "abundant love" and the capacity to "repay offenders with favors." This niggun serves as a sonic meditation on proactive virtue, guiding the soul to embody the transformative power of love, even in challenging interactions. It's the melody of choosing to be a vessel of divine kindness, transforming internal friction into outward grace.

Practice

Our 60-second sing/read ritual is designed to integrate the profound insights of the benoni's journey into the fabric of your daily life, transforming mundane moments into opportunities for spiritual vigilance and grace. Whether you're at home, waiting for coffee, or on your commute, this practice offers a micro-moment to recalibrate your inner compass.

Step 1: Grounding the "Small City" (10 seconds)

Find a moment of quiet. It could be while standing, sitting, or even walking. Take three deep, conscious breaths. Inhale slowly, feeling your chest and abdomen expand, and exhale fully, releasing any tension or distraction. As you breathe, gently bring your awareness to your inner self—your "small city." Acknowledge whatever emotions or thoughts are present without judgment. This step is about honest self-awareness, recognizing the current state of your inner landscape, just as the benoni acknowledges the reawakening of desires.

Step 2: Affirmation of Sovereign Will (20 seconds)

Now, choose one of these phrases, or let them inspire your own, to silently or softly articulate. Let the words resonate not just in your mind, but in the core of your being.

• For acknowledging reawakening desires and choosing resolve: "Though desires reawaken, my will guides my way. My mind rules my heart, as light rules darkness."
• For immediate rejection and redirection: "I thrust out what diminishes, and embrace what elevates. My wisdom rises, banishing folly."
• For cultivating kindness and abundant love: "When discord stirs, my mind chooses love. I extend kindness, mirroring divine grace."

Repeat your chosen phrase two or three times. Feel the weight of the words, their truth in your experience. This is an act of verbalizing the benoni's conscious choice, reinforcing the intellect's sovereignty.

Step 3: Melodic Infusion (20 seconds)

Now, take your chosen phrase and begin to sing it softly, or hum it, using one of the melodic cues we discussed earlier. You don't need to be a trained singer; the intention and feeling are paramount.

• If you chose the phrase about reawakening desires: Hum or sing it with the Niggun of Resilient Return. Start with a sustained, thoughtful tone, allowing a moment of gentle acknowledgement, then let your voice rise with a steady, quiet determination, like a gentle, rhythmic ascent. Feel the steadfastness in your core, the quiet power of your resolve. Let the melody carry the promise of consistent striving.
• If you chose the phrase about immediate rejection: Hum or sing it with the Niggun of Clear Assertion. Begin with a crisp, decisive note, almost like a gentle punctuation mark, and then let your voice confidently soar into a bright, unwavering, and expansive tone. Feel the clarity and lightness that comes from swiftly averting your mind from negativity. Let the melody embody the effortless triumph of light over darkness.
• If you chose the phrase about cultivating kindness: Hum or sing it with the Niggun of Abundant Love. Let your voice be soft, warm, and flowing, with sustained notes that open your heart. Imagine the melody expanding from your chest, embracing yourself and others with compassion. Feel the gentle, expansive nature of abundant love permeating your being.

Repeat the melody with your chosen phrase a few times, allowing the sound to become a vibrational imprint in your body and mind. Let the music become the embodiment of the benoni's inner work—the gentle firmness, the decisive redirection, the expansive love.

Step 4: Integration and Intention (10 seconds)

Take another deep breath, allowing the melody and the affirmation to settle within you. Feel the renewed sense of presence, the quiet strength that comes from conscious choice. Carry this feeling, this internal melody, into your next activity. Let it be a subtle anchor, a reminder that your mind is sovereign, your heart capable of abundant love, and your path one of persistent, graceful striving. This 60-second ritual is a seed; plant it often, and watch your inner garden flourish.

Takeaway

The journey of the benoni, as illuminated by the Tanya, is a profound testament to the human spirit's capacity for sustained self-mastery. It is not a path of effortless perfection, but one of continuous, conscious choice—a graceful dance between acknowledging our deepest desires and asserting the inherent sovereignty of our intellect. The benoni teaches us that spiritual strength is found not in never falling, but in the unwavering commitment to rise, to redirect, and to choose light, kindness, and holiness in every moment.

Music, in its essence, is a constant companion in this journey. It is a vibrational framework for our intentions, a rhythmic breath for our vigilance, and a soaring expression of our highest aspirations. Through niggunim and conscious chanting, we can embody the benoni's steady resolve, his immediate rejection of folly, and his boundless cultivation of love. Let these melodies be the quiet anchors of your soul, reminding you that even when the sublime moments of prayer recede, the enduring song of your divine purpose remains, guiding your heart and illuminating your way. The benoni's path is one of profound inner freedom, a continuous return to our truest selves, orchestrated by the beautiful, unwavering melody of conscious choice.