Tanya, Part I; Likkutei Amarim 13:11

Hook

Remember "Benoni"? If you, like many Hebrew-school dropouts (or even graduates), heard that term tossed around, chances are it landed with a dull thud. Maybe it sounded like "average." "Mediocre." "Not quite good enough." It might have felt like a spiritual participation trophy – "You're not a tzaddik (righteous person), but hey, at least you're not a rasha (wicked person). You're... intermediate." A spiritual purgatory, perhaps, where you’re forever stuck battling your inner demons without ever truly winning. A kind of half-hearted spiritual limbo where the goal felt unattainable, and the struggle, endless.

Let's be real: who needs another category to feel "just okay" when life is already demanding excellence in so many other arenas? We're juggling careers, families, friendships, health, world events – the last thing we need is a spiritual label that makes us feel perpetually behind. If this sounds familiar, if the term "Benoni" made you quietly (or not so quietly) disengage, thinking it wasn't for you, or that spiritual growth meant an impossible eradication of your perfectly human urges and frustrations, you weren't wrong in feeling that way. The way it was often presented missed the mark.

But what if "Benoni" isn't a static, lukewarm spiritual grade? What if it's the most dynamic, empowering, and profoundly realistic spiritual path available to most of us? What if it’s less about being intermediate and more about doing the work of the intermediate, a constant, active state of choosing good, moment by moment, regardless of how you feel? What if it’s the ultimate spiritual hack for the messy, complicated, beautiful reality of adult life? Let's peel back the layers of a truly transformative text and rediscover the vibrant, resilient power of the Benoni. Get ready to ditch the stale take and embrace a fresher, infinitely more liberating perspective.

Context

The ancient mystics and rabbis who penned texts like Tanya weren't just intellectual giants; they were astute observers of the human condition. They understood the internal tug-of-war better than anyone. Before we dive into today's text, let's demystify a core concept that often gets muddled and leads to that "not good enough" feeling: the idea that true spirituality means an absence of "bad" thoughts or desires. This isn't a battle to annihilate parts of yourself; it's a strategic campaign to direct them.

Demystifying "Rule-Heavy" Misconception: The Myth of the Eradicated Evil Inclination

Many spiritual paths, implicitly or explicitly, suggest that growth involves purifying the mind to the point where negative thoughts, selfish desires, or petty emotions simply cease to exist. This can be incredibly frustrating and even damaging. If you're constantly monitoring your internal landscape for any flicker of impatience, jealousy, or craving, and then judging yourself harshly when they inevitably appear, you're setting yourself up for failure and guilt. The Tanya text directly challenges this. It offers a paradigm where the "evil inclination" (or as we might call it, the ego, the animalistic drive, the self-serving urge) isn't banished, but rather managed. The struggle isn't a sign of failure; it's the very arena of your spiritual success.

Bullet 1: Two Souls, One Human

Imagine you're not just one person, but a host for two very distinct "souls" or operating systems. The first is your Nefesh HaBahamit (Animal Soul), rooted in the left side of your heart. It's the engine of your physical existence, your desires for comfort, pleasure, survival, self-preservation, and all worldly pursuits – food, drink, sleep, ambition, even genuine connection, but often viewed through a self-centered lens. It’s not "evil" in itself, but it can certainly lead to "evil" actions if unchecked, because its primary directive is me. The second is your Nefesh Elokit (Divine Soul), residing in your brain and extending into the right side of your heart. This is your spark of the Divine, your innate drive towards truth, connection, meaning, selflessness, and the transcendent. It yearns for wisdom, compassion, and G-d. These two aren't always in harmony. They're often in a wrestling match for control over your "small city"—your body and mind.

Bullet 2: The "Small City" as Your Inner World

The Zohar and later Chassidic thought often describe the human body and mind as a "small city" (Ir Ketana). This isn't just a quaint metaphor; it's a strategic map. Every part of you – your thoughts, feelings, speech, and actions – is a district within this city. The "rulers" are your two souls, each vying for influence. The brain is often seen as the seat of the Divine Soul's intellect, while the heart (especially the left side) is the seat of the Animal Soul's passions. This means the battle isn't abstract; it's happening in your every thought, every impulse, every word you consider speaking, every action you contemplate. Understanding this framework helps us see that internal conflict isn't a flaw, but the natural state of a being animated by both the physical and the spiritual.

Bullet 3: The Benoni's Victory is in Action, Not Emotion

This is the crux. For most of us, being a Benoni isn't about achieving a state where we no longer feel the pull of our animalistic desires. It's about consistently choosing not to act on those pulls when they conflict with our higher purpose. The evil inclination in the Benoni is not abolished; it's present, strong, and constantly offering its "opinion." The victory is in the decision to follow the Divine Soul's guidance, even when the inner voice of self-interest is loud and compelling. It’s about exercising free will, not about purifying emotion. This shifts the goalpost from an unattainable internal serenity to a realistic and empowering external integrity. You don't have to stop feeling frustrated to choose patience. You don't have to stop wanting that extra cookie to choose restraint. Your spiritual success is measured in your choices and actions, not in the absence of temptation. This is where the power lies.

Text Snapshot

Therewith will be understood the commentary of our Sages¹ Berachot 61b. that “intermediate people are judged by both [the good and evil natures], for it is written, ‘When He stands at the right of the destitute to deliver him from the judges of his soul.’”² “Judges”—in the plural, allegorically interpreted to refer to the two impulses which motivate man’s actions. Note that they did not say “ruled” by both, G–d forbid, because where the evil nature gains any control and dominion over the “small city,” even though but temporarily, one is at such times deemed “wicked.” The evil nature [in the benoni], however, is no more than, for example, a magistrate or judge who gives his opinion on a point of law, yet it is not necessarily a final decision to be implemented in deed, for there is another magistrate or judge who is contesting this opinion. It is, therefore, necessary to arbitrate between the two, and the final verdict rests with the arbitrator. Similarly, the evil nature states its opinion in the left part of the heart,³ The “seat” of the passions. Cf. above, ch. 9. which thence ascends to the brain for contemplation. Immediately it is challenged by the second judge, the divine soul in the brain⁴ The intellect is the forte of the divine soul. Ibid. extending into the right part of the heart, the abode of the good nature. The final verdict comes from the arbitrator—the Holy One, blessed is He, who comes to the aid of the good nature, as our Sages said, “If the Holy One, blessed is He, did not help him, he could not overcome his evil inclination.”⁵ Kiddushin 30b. The help comes by means of the glow radiated by the Divine light, which illuminates the divine soul, that it may gain the upper hand and mastery over the folly of the fool and evil nature, in the manner of the excellence of light over darkness, as stated above.⁶ Ch. 12. Yet, inasmuch as the evil in the [heart’s] left part of the benoni is in its innate strength, craving after all the pleasures of this world, not having been nullified in its minuteness in relation to the good, nor having been relegated from its position to any degree—except insofar as it has no authority and power to diffuse itself throughout the limbs of the body, because the Holy One, blessed is He, “stands at the right hand of the poor man,” helping him and irradiating his divine soul—such a person is likened to a “wicked man.” In the words of our Sages, “Even if the whole world tells you that you are righteous, in your own eyes regard yourself as if you were wicked”⁷ Niddah 30b.—not as actually wicked.⁸ Here is the answer to the question raised in the beginning of ch. 1. The clue is in the word כרשע (not רשע). But one should consider oneself to be a benoni and not accept the world’s opinion which would have him believe that the evil in him has been dissolved by the good, which is the category of a tzaddik. Rather should he consider himself in his own estimation as if the very essence of the evil is in its full strength and might, in the left part, as from birth, and that nothing of it has ceased or departed; on the contrary, with the passing of time it has gained strength, because the man has indulged it considerably, in eating and drinking and other mundane pursuits. Even one whose whole aspiration is in G–d’s Torah, which he studies day and night for its own sake, this is still no proof whatsoever that the evil has been dislodged from its place, but it may still be that its essence and substance are in their full strength and might in its abode in the left part, except that its garments—the thought, speech, and act of the animal soul—are not invested in the brain, mouth, and hands and the other parts of the body, because G–d has given the mind supremacy and dominion over the heart. Therefore the divine soul in the intellect rules over the [entire] “small city,” i.e., all the parts of the body, making them a garment and vehicle for her three garments, wherein to be clothed, to wit, the thought, speech, and act of the 613 commandments of the Torah. However, in its essence and substance, the divine soul in the benoni has no preponderance over the animal soul, except at the time when his love for G–d manifests itself in his heart on propitious occasions, such as during prayer and the like. Even then it is limited to preponderance and dominion alone, as is written, “And one nation shall prevail over the other,”⁹ Genesis 25:23. that is, when one rises the other falls, and vice versa. Thus, when the divine soul gains strength and ascendancy over the animal soul, in the source of gevurot which is binah,¹⁰ Chochmah corresponds to chesed; binah—to gevurah. through pondering on the greatness of G–d, the En Sof, blessed is He, thereby generating intense and flaming love of G–d in the right part of his heart—then the sitra achara in the left part is subdued. But it is not entirely abolished, in the case of the benoni; it is so only in a tzaddik, concerning whom it is said, “My heart is void within me.”¹¹ Psalms 109:22. The latter despises and hates evil with a consummate hatred and contempt, or without quite such complete hatred, as is explained above.¹² Ch. 10, with reference to the two types of tzaddik. But in a benoni it is, by way of example, similar to a sleeping man, who can awaken from his sleep. So is the evil in the benoni dormant, as it were, in the left part, during the recital of the Shema and the Prayer [Amidah], when his heart is aglow with the love of G–d, but later it can wake up again. For this reason Rabbah considered himself as though he were a benoni,¹³ See ch. 1. though his mouth never ceased from study, and his desire was in G–d’s Torah, day and night, with the passionate craving and longing of a soul yearning for G–d with overwhelming love, such as experienced during the reciting of the Shema and Amidah. Hence he appeared in his own eyes like a benoni who prays all day, as, indeed, our Sages have said, “Would that a man prayed the whole day long!”¹⁴ Berachot 21a. Now, this quality of love of which we speak in the case of the benonim (intermediates) which is attained at the time of prayer by virtue of the preponderance of the divine soul, etc., is, in comparison with the degree attained by the tzaddikim who serve G–d in perfect truth, not called “true service” at all, since it passes and disappears after prayer, and it is written, “The lip of truth shall be established forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment.”¹⁵ Proverbs 12:19. Nevertheless, in relation to the rank of the benonim, it is regarded as a truly perfect service in terms of their [level of] truth, in each man relative to his standing in the ranks of the benonim. For in their case, too, their love, during their prayers, may be termed “the lip of truth shall be established forever,” since their divine soul has the power to reawaken this kind of love constantly, during its preponderance in time of prayer day after day, by means of an appropriate [mental] preparation, each soul according to its intrinsic quality and rank. For truth is the attribute of Jacob, who is called¹⁶ Zohar I:1b; 224a. the “middle bolt which secures [everything] from end to end,”¹⁷ Comp. Exodus 26:28. from the highest gradations and degrees to the end of all grades. And in each gradation and plane it fixes its bolt through the most central point, which is the point and quality of its attribute of truth. The attribute of truth is an unbounded inheritance which has no limit upward to the highest degrees, while all lower gradations and degrees are as nothing compared with those that are superior to them. [As is known to the students of Kabbalah, that the quality which is, as it were, the “head” and “intellect” of lower grades is inferior to the so-called “soles” and “feet” of the grades above them. Compare the statement of our Sages, “The feet of the Chayot measure up to them all.”]¹⁸ Chagigah 13a.

New Angle

This text from Tanya doesn't just reframe an old concept; it hands us a toolkit for navigating the profound complexities of modern adult life with spiritual resilience and genuine self-compassion. It tackles head-on the persistent internal chatter, the exhaustion of conflicting desires, and the search for authentic meaning amidst the daily grind. Let's dig into two transformative insights.

Insight 1: Your Inner Voice is an Opinion, Not a Command – The Power of the Arbitrator

The text kicks off with a seemingly subtle but utterly revolutionary distinction: the intermediate person (the Benoni) is "judged by both" the good and evil natures, not "ruled" by them. This is not semantic hair-splitting; it's a profound re-calibration of our internal experience. The evil nature, the yetzer hara, is "no more than, for example, a magistrate or judge who gives his opinion on a point of law, yet it is not necessarily a final decision to be implemented in deed." This means that every fleeting desire, every impulse to procrastinate, every urge to snap back, every craving for instant gratification, every flicker of self-doubt or cynicism – these are just opinions. They are not mandates. They are not the final say.

Think about this in the context of your adult life. How many times have you felt hijacked by an impulse? The urge to check your phone just one more time during a meeting. The craving for a third slice of pizza when you know you'll regret it. The simmering resentment towards a colleague that makes you want to passive-aggressively sabotage their project. The impulse to give up on a tough task because it feels too hard. These aren't necessarily you in your highest, most conscious state. They are the yetzer hara – that animal soul – stating its case. And it's a persuasive litigator, often backed by years of conditioning and habit.

The genius of Tanya is that it normalizes this internal noise. It tells us that these voices don't disappear, even for very spiritually advanced individuals. Rabbah, a towering Talmudic sage, considered himself a Benoni, despite his ceaseless Torah study and intense prayer. This isn't because he was failing; it's because he understood the persistent nature of the yetzer hara. It's like a sleeping man who can awaken from his sleep – it's always there, ready to pipe up.

So, you weren't wrong if you thought that perhaps truly spiritual people were free from these annoying, sometimes debilitating, internal battles. The truth is, they're not. They just handle them differently. They recognize the "magistrate's opinion" for what it is: an option, not a decree.

The text then introduces the second judge: the divine soul in the brain, which immediately challenges this opinion. This is your higher intellect, your conscience, your aspiration for good, your awareness of purpose. The crucial part? "The final verdict comes from the arbitrator—the Holy One, blessed is He, who comes to the aid of the good nature." This is not an abstract theological point; it's a practical, accessible promise. We are not left alone to referee this internal wrestling match. Divine assistance is a given, "by means of the glow radiated by the Divine light, which illuminates the divine soul, that it may gain the upper hand." This "glow" isn't a miraculous intervention that makes your problems disappear; it's the subtle clarity, the sudden surge of willpower, the unexpected perspective shift that allows you to choose wisely. It's the quiet strength that enables you to say "no" to the immediate gratification and "yes" to your long-term values.

This matters because it radically shifts our understanding of personal responsibility and spiritual progress. Instead of exhaustively trying to silence or eradicate the "bad" thoughts (a battle often lost before it begins), our job is to recognize them as opinions and then consciously choose to align our actions with our divine soul. This frees us from the guilt of having the thought in the first place. You can be furious at your boss in your head, but still choose to respond with professionalism and kindness. You can desperately want to hit snooze for the fifth time, but still choose to get up and tackle your day. The victory isn't in the absence of the impulse, but in the choice to transcend it.

This understanding is profoundly liberating for adult life. We are constantly bombarded with conflicting demands and desires. Our animal soul wants ease, comfort, and immediate reward. Our divine soul strives for purpose, connection, and long-term fulfillment. Recognizing that the former is merely an "opinion" empowers us to engage with the latter. It means that your daily acts of discipline, kindness, patience, and integrity, even when they feel like an uphill battle against your inner desires, are precisely where your spiritual muscle is built. You're not waiting for enlightenment to stop having bad thoughts; you're enacting enlightenment by choosing good actions despite those thoughts. This is active, dynamic spirituality for the real world.

Insight 2: The Enduring "Truth" of Your Benoni Service – Sustaining Meaning in the Long Haul

The text delves deeper into the Benoni's reality. It states that even a person whose "whole aspiration is in G-d's Torah, which he studies day and night for its own sake," might still find that the "evil has been dislodged from its place." On the contrary, its "essence and substance are in their full strength and might in its abode in the left part, as from birth." This is a stark, almost brutal honesty. The yetzer hara doesn't get weaker with spiritual practice; in some ways, it might even get stronger as you develop your capacity for indulgence! The difference is that "G-d has given the mind supremacy and dominion over the heart." Your divine soul, through intellect and conscious choice, can rule over the body's actions (thought, speech, act), making them "garments and vehicles" for divine commandments.

However, the text continues, "in its essence and substance, the divine soul in the benoni has no preponderance over the animal soul, except at the time when his love for G-d manifests itself in his heart on propitious occasions, such as during prayer and the like." Even then, it's a temporary "preponderance and dominion," like "one nation shall prevail over the other," meaning when one rises, the other falls, and vice versa. This is crucial: the Benoni doesn't achieve a permanent state of inner serenity where the evil nature is abolished (that's the Tzaddik). For the Benoni, the evil is "sleeping," but "later it can wake up again."

This is the spiritual reality for most of us. We have moments of profound inspiration, clarity, and connection – during prayer, meditation, a meaningful conversation, witnessing a sunset, or engaging in acts of deep compassion. In those moments, our love for G-d (or for goodness, for humanity, for purpose) flares up, subduing the self-serving aspects of our animal soul. But then... life happens. The kids need breakfast, the boss sends an urgent email, the car breaks down, the plumbing leaks. And suddenly, the yetzer hara – that "sleeping man" – stirs, yawns, and starts offering its opinions again: "You're tired, just scroll for a bit." "Why bother? No one will notice." "You deserve a break."

If our measure of "true service" was permanent, unwavering emotional purity, we'd all be lost. The text acknowledges this directly: the Benoni's love and service, "in comparison with the degree attained by the tzaddikim who serve G-d in perfect truth, is not called 'true service' at all, since it passes and disappears after prayer." This is the brutal truth. If your spiritual high from Shabbat or Sunday service evaporates by Monday morning, you're not a Tzaddik. You're a Benoni. And that's okay. In fact, it's more than okay.

Here's the re-enchantment: "Nevertheless, in relation to the rank of the benonim, it is regarded as a truly perfect service in terms of their [level of] truth... their love, during their prayers, may be termed 'the lip of truth shall be established forever,' since their divine soul has the power to reawaken this kind of love constantly, during its preponderance in time of prayer day after day, by means of an appropriate [mental] preparation."

This insight is a profound balm for the adult soul constantly striving amidst the ebb and flow of life. You weren't wrong if you felt discouraged when your spiritual highs were inevitably followed by mundane lows. That's the Benoni experience. The key is that your divine soul has the power to reawaken that love and connection constantly. Your intermittent moments of deep connection, your conscious efforts to re-engage, your consistent choice to prepare your mind for prayer or mindful action – these are your "lip of truth established forever." This isn't about achieving a permanent state; it's about the capacity for consistent re-engagement.

This matters because it validates the cyclical nature of spiritual growth and effort in adult life. We don't live in monasteries. We live in a world that constantly pulls us in a million directions. The text tells us that our "true service" isn't measured by a static, unwavering emotional state, but by our ability to consistently return to our higher selves. It's about showing up again and again, even after the "sleeping man" has woken up. It's about the daily commitment to re-ignite that inner spark.

The text concludes by linking this to "truth," the attribute of Jacob, who is called the "middle bolt which secures [everything] from end to end." This "middle bolt" of truth ensures that your genuine effort, at your level, however "intermediate" it may feel, is connected to the highest spiritual realms. Your struggle, your renewed efforts, your daily choices – they are not insignificant. They are the bolts that hold the entire structure together. Your specific, unique truth, expressed in your daily choices as a Benoni, is a vital part of the cosmic tapestry. This is not about achieving some abstract, "perfect" spirituality; it's about perfecting your truth, your effort, your re-engagement, day after day. It's the ultimate permission slip to be human, and to find profound spiritual meaning within that humanity.

Low-Lift Ritual

Okay, so we've established that your inner critic's constant "opinions" are just that, and that your spiritual highs are real, even if temporary. How do we put this into practice without adding another daunting item to your already overflowing to-do list? Let's try something simple, repeatable, and deeply rooted in the text: The "Pause, Pinpoint & Pivot" Practice.

This ritual is designed to take advantage of those moments when the yetzer hara (your animal soul, your self-serving impulse) pipes up. It's about recognizing its "opinion" and then consciously engaging your divine soul and inviting divine assistance for a different choice.

The "Pause, Pinpoint & Pivot" Practice (≤2 minutes)

1. Pause (15-30 seconds): When you feel an unwelcome impulse, a negative thought, or a self-serving desire arise – perhaps you're about to snap at your spouse, procrastinate on an important task, scroll mindlessly, or indulge in something you know isn't good for you – stop. Don't act immediately. Just pause. Take a deep breath. This creates a tiny sliver of space, a micro-moment for the "arbitrator" to enter. This is you recognizing that this inner voice is an opinion, not a command. You're not being "ruled" by it; you're being "judged."

   • Example: You feel a surge of impatience in a long queue. Instead of letting it bubble up into a frustrated sigh or a glare, you simply pause. Breathe.

2. Pinpoint (15-30 seconds): In this pause, mentally identify the impulse. Don't judge it; just name it. "Ah, hello, impatience." "There's that urge to check my email again." "This is the desire for immediate comfort." The text tells us the yetzer hara "states its opinion in the left part of the heart." By pinpointing it, you're observing it, not becoming it. You're acknowledging its presence but asserting your separate identity from it. This is your divine soul, residing in your intellect, stepping up as the "second judge," challenging the opinion. You're recognizing that this is an opinion, not the opinion.

   • Example: You mentally say, "This is the feeling of impatience, the desire for things to move faster." You don't say, "I am impatient" or "I shouldn't feel this way."

3. Pivot (30-60 seconds): Now, consciously make a choice. This is where the "arbitrator"—Divine help—comes in. You might mentally ask for clarity, strength, or the right perspective. "May I be given the strength to choose patience." "Help me focus on what truly matters now." "Guide me to respond with kindness." Then, choose an action that aligns with your higher self. This could be a physical action (put the phone down, smile at your spouse, return to the task) or an internal one (shift your focus, silently send a blessing to the person causing the delay). This is the "glow radiated by the Divine light" illuminating your divine soul, allowing it to "gain the upper hand and mastery."

   • Example: You take another breath, mentally inviting calm. You might then choose to observe the people around you with curiosity instead of frustration, or use the time to plan your next action, or simply mentally recite a prayer. You pivot from the impulse to a chosen, higher action.

Why This Matters:

This practice isn't about eradicating negative impulses, which the text explicitly tells us is the domain of a Tzaddik. It's about consistently practicing the Benoni's power: the power of conscious choice and the reliance on divine assistance. Each "Pause, Pinpoint & Pivot" is a small victory, a moment where your divine soul asserts its dominion over your body's actions, making them "garments and vehicles" for goodness. It validates your internal struggle as a spiritual arena, not a personal failing. It reinforces that you are never alone in this battle, and that your power to reawaken your higher self is always available. It's a micro-training session for your spiritual muscle, building your capacity to choose wisely, even when the inner magistrate is loudly stating its opinion. Try it a few times this week, and notice the subtle shift in your sense of agency and peace.

Chevruta Mini

Grab a friend, a partner, or even just your journal, and reflect on these questions:

1. The text states that in a Benoni, the evil inclination is "no more than, for example, a magistrate or judge who gives his opinion on a point of law, yet it is not necessarily a final decision." How does viewing your negative impulses or self-serving desires as mere "opinions" (rather than overwhelming commands or reflections of your true self) shift your perspective on internal struggles or moments of self-judgment?
2. The text explicitly highlights that "If the Holy One, blessed is He, did not help him, he could not overcome his evil inclination." This indicates that divine assistance is integral to our spiritual victories. Beyond a formal prayer, how might you consciously invite or recognize this divine assistance in a practical, everyday moment this week when you're facing an internal challenge (e.g., choosing patience over anger, diligence over procrastination, kindness over cynicism)?

Takeaway

You are not broken for having conflicting desires. Your inner world is precisely what it's meant to be: a dynamic arena where two powerful forces vie for your attention. The transformative truth of the Benoni is that your power doesn't lie in silencing one of those voices, but in consistently choosing which one to empower through your actions. You are not meant to achieve a static, feeling-less purity; you are called to a vibrant, active path of continuous return, moment by moment. Every conscious "Pause, Pinpoint & Pivot," every decision to align with your higher self even when your animal soul is loud, is a genuine spiritual victory. And here's the best part: you're not alone in that fight. Divine help is always present, illuminating your path and strengthening your resolve. Your sincere effort, at your unique level, is a "lip of truth established forever"—a powerful, enduring contribution to the fabric of existence. So, embrace the beautiful, messy reality of being a Benoni, and rediscover the profound joy and purpose in your ongoing, empowered choices.